Man it is late. I'm so tired. I've spent the last five days pretty much away from home: some nights at friend's houses, one at my girlfriend's, I even slept on a park bench last night, after telling mom I was at Gabe's for the night...but it hasn't helped. My sleeping has been sporadic and brief; I keep waking up, scared half to death. I know what I've done for the last five days, but I don't remember any of the details. And I'm getting paranoid, I keep looking over my shoulder, thinking I see Him, running like mad when I think I do. And the dreams. No, The Dream, it has become so vivid I can make out individual splinters as the wood gives way and explodes in the heat and flame. That's what woke me up just now. I'm at my house again, but I don't remember coming here...but I know I came under way own will.
I'm leaving tomorrow. I've made up my mind. Just staying away from the house won't work, I've got to get out of this town. I don't know where to go, exactly, I don't know how I'll survive exactly. But I won't just walk into His arms, I won't just lay down and accept defeat. I'll run. I'm leaving tomorrow, after mom's gone to work.
I'm scared, but I can't see any other way out of this...I don't know whether I'll post here anymore, but I will if I can.
Goodbye, at least for now.